Very Special

I am someone whose emotions ride very close to the surface. Most of you already know that about me. Not just emotions that bring tears, but all emotions, anger, fear, sadness, love, affection, all of them. Because of this, I have made many a mistake in my life of which my anger has controlled situations that should have been dealt with after I had let my emotions ride their wave and pass. On the flip side, my emotions of joy, happiness and the spirit ride very much close to the surface and even much more now that I am pregnant. I cry when I'm filled with joy and before I was ever pregnant, whenever I am in the presence of a "special person" the spirit is so strong and I cannot control my tears. Being pregnant only amplifies this emotion!

Today in Sacrament Meeting the program was done by a SPECIAL NEEDS GROUP. All ages ranged in the program. They have a mutual group where they get together and do activities, games, plays, etc.. I guess our ward has them come once a year and do the program. Bad, bad, bad day to wear makeup. As I sat there and listened to these sweet spirits give their talks and sing songs, my heart was filled with the spirit so much that I actually felt as though it was on fire. I cried as each one gave their talk and bore their testimonies. Some, you couldn't understand but the spirit was so incredibly strong you couldn't help but feel like you were listening to them speak with absolute clarity.

Some of the talks consisted of the following. One gentleman bore his testimony about the Temple. He held 2 cards in his hands, one was a credit card and one was his temple recommend. Although, he would shake and his speech was not clear, his heart and spirit spoke volumes. He held up his credit card and said, "We use this card all the time..." and then he held up his temple recommend and said, "But THIS is the card that we should be using all the time." Another read a poem about how she is different and how one day she will see and do the things that we do and take for granted. One gentlemen was deaf and stood there and signed his talk while an interpreter gave the translation. The amount of POWER that came from these sacred spirits was overwhelming. As they sang the last song, "I Am A Child of God", I bawled as two of the directors of the group held up one of the young men up at the pulpit and he sang one of the verses. He was shaking, crippled, his speech was slurred but NOTHING could mistaken the spirit, testimony and love that young man had as he belted out the words that he knew were so true... "I AM A CHILD OF GOD". I found myself shaking as the spirit touched me and my tears were beyond uncontrollable. I physically could not stop myself from crying and I knew how truly blessed I was to have heard from this fine and elect group.

I have always felt like I was going to have a child that would be "handicapped" in someway. Whether I do or not, these sweet spirits bring a burning in my bosom every time I am in the presence of one. It made me think about how they are going back to our Father in Heaven no matter what and how this life is "our test" and they have already passed. It also reminded me of a great man I was never able to meet myself but have heard a great deal about and is someone my husband loves and respects greatly. GRANDPA JONES. Josh's grandpa passed away about a year before Josh and I met. This man worked in a training school with these types of kids all his life. I knew that the program today would touch Josh for some of the same reasons as me but I knew that as I saw tears trickle down his cheek he was reminded of his grandpa, who loved these kids more than words could explain. He was indeed a very special man and I believe it takes someone very special to care for them. I was reminded that I need to be less selfish and more loving. If we could all live our lives like these great spirits, who have the pure love of Christ...